This week’s SATURDAY SIX takes a look at Christmas through the Magic of Movies! The SATURDAY SIX and movies go together like pepperoni and pizza, chocolate and peanut butter, and insects and lollipops (well, maybe not the last one.) We’ve done articles on Avatar, Star Wars, and even the Disney animated film library. This week we’re going to look at our favorite genre of Hollywood, Christmas movies. Every Thanksgiving we pull all of our Christmas stuff out of the garage, and among that junk those annual traditions is our treasured box of Christmas DVDs. Pretty much every night until Christmas itself you’ll find us watching timeless classics such as Muppet’s Christmas Carol, Elf, The Grinch Who Stole ChristmasEmmet Otter’s Jug Band Christmas, or Miracle on 34th Street. Today we’re going to take a look at some of our favorite Christmas films, several of which have tie-ins to the theme park world we know. Let’s kickoff the countdown with…

# 6 – Now That Disney Owns DIE HARD, A Few Changes May Need To Be Made To The Christmas Classic…

The Die Hard franchise is famously known for television stations working overtime on “creative” ways to coverup the movie’s curse words. With Disney now in charge of the brand, there’s a chance something else needs to be made more family friendly: the film’s liberal use of guns. Readers may remember it was just two years ago this very month when Disney began to remove all guns from property. This new mandate included bubble guns sold at the outdoor kiosks. So while we still may have the Frontierland Shootin’ Arcade and the cold steel wielded by Jungle Cruise skippers, you won’t find any guns at the gift shops (they all went to the Outlets, and we mean all of them.)

With a little Disney Magic, we can make one scene in particular more “family friendly.”

Die Hard. (art by Matt Cleary)
Die Hard. (art by Matt Cleary)

# 5 – Meanwhile, Universal Prepares To Deliver A New Gift For Its Fans

Like Ralphie Parker in A Christmas Story, each of us had that One Special Gift we always wanted growing up. For me, it was a Han Solo blaster.

For theme park fans, our precious theme park rides of years past have been pushed aside for 3-4 minute “experiences” that must be based around an intellectual property. On Christmas Eve, our silent wish will be for the rides we used to get.

FAST & FURIOUS: SUPERCHARGED OPENING SOON!

# 4  – The 2018 Ad Campaign For Disney’s Hollywood Studios

What about using an iconic moment from Home Alone to try and get across what it’s like walking through a theme park that costs as much per day as Epcot?

State of Disney’s Hollywood Studios, December 22, 2017. (photo by @bioreconstruct)

# 3 – Cinnamon Bun Cheeseburgers. Pop Tart Sandwiches. Poop Snacks. We finally get a look inside the Disney “Test Kitchen”

Over the years we have seen some next level bonkers food items at Walt Disney World. Who can forget the Pop Tart Sandwich, which had bacon and an egg-like substance in-between two Pop Tarts? Have you been to the All-Star resorts and tried the Cinnamon Bun Cheeseburger from the (thankfully) secret menu? Let’s be honest, we’re talking about a company which put out a line of baked goods in the form of animal feces. How do these foods get made? Well, thanks to the movie Elf, we now have an idea…

 

# 2 – It’s A Wonderful Life Looks At Current Events

Christmas movies are often used as allegories for situations we deal with in every day life. What better film than It’s a Wonderful Life to explain the complexities of the recent Disney purchase of Fox?

“Now wait…now listen…now listen to me. I beg of you not to do this thing. If we let Iger do this, there will never be another original movie built in this town. He’s already got charge of Star Wars. He’s got Marvel. He’s got Pixar. And now he’s after Fox. Why? It’s very simple. Have you forgotten when they tried to ban the LA Times because of unfavorable coverage? That blew up in their face, but don’t you think they’ll try again now that they’re more powerful and have more carrots to dangle in front of the press? With this merger, 5,000 -10,000 people are probably going to lose their jobs. 21st Century Fox will now have more shares of Disney stock than anyone else. These are the people who run Fox News. Can’t you understand what’s happening here? We’ve got to stick together, though. We’ve got to have faith in each other.

# 1 – If anyone wants to know what we think of a Marvel themed roller coaster replacing the opening day Universe of Energy dark ride…

To paraphrase Cousin Eddie from Christmas Vacation

So there you have it: The SATURDAY SIX Looks At Christmas Through The Magic Of Movies! See you next weekend for the latest installment of the SATURDAY SIX, where we’ll look at something fun from the world of Disney and Universal. If you enjoyed yourself, be sure to check out The Magic, The Memories, and Merch! articles, or, for your listening pleasure, check out the E-Ticket Report podcast. You can also follow Your Humble Author on Twitter (@derekburgan).

The gift you didn’t want,
but the gift you need.

If you enjoyed this article, you will surely like the following:

6 Pieces of Disney Merchandise That Don’t Exists (But Totally Should)

6 Times The Simpsons Nailed Being A Theme Park Fan

Walt Disney World Locations Used in Hulk Hogan’s THUNDER IN PARADISE

SATURDAY SIX Looks At Ways Disney Can Introduce MARVEL Into The Parks

The SATURDAY SIX Uses Disney Villains To Explain Theme Park Blogging

6 Times Our Favorite TV Shows Went To Walt Disney World

Special Thanks to crack staff photographer Brandon Glover,  the bio-est of all reconstructs @Bioreconstruct, master photo manipulator Matt Cleary, and blogger to the stars Megan Stump for their invaluable assistance with this article. Be sure to also check out Brandon on The Park Blogger podcast with goofballs co-hosts Aengus Mackenzie and LitemAndHyde , while fellow Potterheads may enjoy Meg’s work on the Central Florida Slug Club.

FINAL PLUG! Did you know The 2018 Unofficial Guide to Universal Orlando has a special edition of the SATURDAY SIX in it? Finally, someone came up with an actual reason to read a book. ORDER this baby now!

6 COMMENTS

  1. Great Saturday Six as always. Just clarify something, though. FOXNews is not part of this merger. So thankfully Disney will not have control of news sources other than ABC News, ESPN, Regional Fox Sports News….(wow, that is still a lot of media to control!)

    • Of everything mentioned, only Fox News is experiencing growth. Plus, their viewers love their product. Perhaps they should be studied instead of mocked, as for some reason Derek saw fit to do. ABC News is irrelevant and ESPN won’t exist in 5 years.

  2. I can’t believe I finally found someone else who likes Emmet Otter’s Jugband Christmas! I once bought a Disney Sing-A-Long VHS at Disney World for the sole reason that it had the song “BBQ” on it!

    • I’ve been a fan of Emmet Otter ever since I saw on it on TV growing up. Have at least three different versions of it on DVD and was this-close to picking up a fourth this past week. In recent editions the sections with Kermit the frog have been excised from the movie (certainly a rights issue) and the most recent edition had him on the cover. I basically just talked myself into buying it, be right back!

Comments are closed.